|
Advice For A Zombie Outbreak By Andrei Moldovan I was watching a few movies lately, and I noticed a weird trend in Zombie movies. In EVERY SINGLE zombie movie I have EVER watched 1 of three things happens: 1. The hero/heroin narrowly escape with their lives, and usually all their fellow friends convert to the zombie stage or blow their own brains out so they DON’T turn into zombies. 2. EVERYONE DIES!!!!!!!!!!!! No if and or buts. They’re screwed! Most of the people that last long are the smart or strong, but in the end your dead!. 3. At least one person meets with a group of (usually) rednecks and come to the rescue of their fellow friends. But then again in the middle of a world infested with zombies most people aren’t very sane. So in the end shit happens and more people die. Sooooooooooooooo anyways, if zombies ever attack do one of the following..... 1. Kill as many as you can and hope/pray someone will come and save you. Or hope some redneck comes along and helps you... 2. Crawl into a corner and cry like the little mamas boy/girl you are. 3. Run like your being chased by zombies.... well in this case you ARE being chased by zombies. so ya... 4. Fuck it. Your going to die anyway. Do what ever you can to get drunk get laid and have fun. 5. Find the nearest minimart, block all the doors and windows, and go to town on all the beer/vodka/whatever you find that can totally fuck you up so bad you have no idea what’s going on. 6. Blow your brains out. Its better than being turned into a mindless eating machine... 7. if your into it, turn yourself into a zombie... hey it could be fun. (Look at it this way: you can now kill anyone you want and have NO regrets... you’re already dead)
|
|
